PS You Can Do This

 I ran my first real legit tempo of the training plan this morning. You guys. It was so hard. Let's talk about it. 

I woke up to very overcast skies and worried a tiny bit about the weather and the thought of running this on the treadmill crossed my mind. With a workout so pace specific though, I realized I couldn't because of the lack of trust in my 'mill and its speed read out. I could go by effort, but I wanted to really know what my MP felt like in real life, not just what I thought it would feel like on the machine. I started with 1 mile warm up and didn't know my route for sure until I crossed the intersection turning myself away from the track. I was thinking maybe I could handle 5 miles on the track because it would be flat but I got bored just thinking about it so I kept going in the neighborhood. Hills will happen and I need to practice. So I did. 

My first 1.5 miles were a tiny incline, enough to make me a little worried and huff and puff a bit. Then as it flattened out I tried to maintain my sanity and keep my pace even. I really didn't move out of the pace zone as much as I thought I would, it's mostly the warmup and c/down where my pace becomes an issue. I am all over the place. I turned around halfway and continued on back. I tried to maintain the 'comfortably hard' feeling I've read about for tempo runs although some of the tiny hills made it feel more hard than comfortable, but I made it. 

The nice thing about tempos and about running with a warmup is that the run doesn't ever get to boring. I'm working the whole time, and working hard keeps my mind busy. Workouts with a purpose seem to turn on a part of my brain that makes it feel like a project and reminds me this is part of meeting my goal, this right now, what I'm doing, is going to help me run the race in September better or worse. It's also nice to have a specific goal to remind myself of when I'm doubting if I want to even put my running shoes on. Even after all my fretting beforehand, I realized at about mile 2 that oh, PS I can do this. I caught myself with the phrase on repeat until it was cool down time so it became my official tempo mantra. BTW self, you can do this hard thing even though you doubt yourself sometimes and ate ice cream yesterday and then some cookies and maybe didn't sleep enough and are running without fueling and your shoes have 430 miles on them and you are really tired and your legs feel like lead and you are not that fast anyway. This training plan so far has taught me that my internal monologue is really important and I need to start feeding it strong and positive data if I'm going to keep this up. 

I made the mistake just now of looking a few weeks ahead on my schedule. So, see you guys later I'm going to go throw up in fear now. I mean, I can do hard things and I'm only thinking about my next run. Trust the training. 

Do you freakout during training?

Do you think the physical or mental aspect is harder when running and training?